Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The Good Old Hockey Game

A little Stompin' Tom anyone?

I regret not having blogged as soon as I got home from the game last Tuesday - I am not sure my observations will be quite as funny after a week (or that some of you have been waiting so long that it won't seem all that funny). Geez, maybe it wasn't funny after all - I was fueled by a Caesar at the time (first since I got home - and it was potent!)

We had gret seats, in the first row of the 200 level, right behind one of the goals. The taciturn but friendly French gentleman sitting next to us told me that he had been in the same seats last year and that the Prime Minister had been sitting in the section just below us and had to sign autographs between periods.

Behind us were some rather interesting characters - first off I have to say it was Ottawa vs. Toronto, or what they refer to as "The Battle of Ontario" (you have to read that with a big deep announcers voice by the way). The Sens and Leafs are not the best of friends - two Swedish captains and a lot of history in the last couple of years.

There were a lot of Leafs fans in the building for the game - I have to give Toronto credit, their fans are faithful. And hold out hope for the impossible (ouch - that's the Montrealer in me bashing Toronto. But it's so easy to do - no?)

We were on an aisle - in the 3 seats behind us there were some serious Ottawa fans (though I am wondering if there are any other kind - I've never seen so many jerseys on fans before). They were pretty hard core though - they had nicknames for every player. I mean everyone calls Alfredson "Alfie" but they had "Fishie" for Fisher, "Reddy" for Redden, "Heater" for Dany Heatly... need I go on?

They also kept up a running commentary that I would normally associate with Hockey parents. They never shut up. They had something to say about every penalty - though I agree that the refereeing was definitely in Toronto's favour - we had the equivalent of a period of penalities by the end of the game. I think if the Sens were anywhere within 2 feet of a Leaf player tripping over a bad patch of ice there was a penalty.

One of the women in particular had a whole lot to say about the Leafs fans booing Alfie (though once I heard the story I could kinda understand it).

The man seemed to think he was an auxilliary coach - I almost wanted to frisk him to see if he was wired. 3 hours of :

"Come on guys, keep up the pressure"
"You can do better than that guys!"
"What was that guys?"
"Guys - it's just a 3 goal lead, don't let up!!!" (this one was in the 1st half of the 1st period - I wanted to slip something into his drink, he was so tightly wound).

Next to them was a young guy in a Leafs sweater (not Jersey). He had that look of "Daddy's money bought me these seats". He spent the 10 minutes before the game on his cell phone shouting "No! I'm behind the Sens goal - look, here I am!" and waving his arms frantically.

And then he did the unforgivable - HE BOOED THE SENS WHEN THEY CAME OUT ON THE ICE.

That is a punishable offence in my eyes. And bloody rude. I don't think there is ever a reason to boo the other team (okay, wait, maybe if they do something really heinous or unsportsmanly). And especially not in THEIR arena. Poor form young man!!

Jack Todd (a favorite columnist of mine) had a great article about the Montreal fans booing the Sens this weekend. I am mortified that Montreal fans were as guilty as Leafs fans.

He had brought a girl to the game. Think Barbie. Tiny, Asian barbie. She seemed sweet enough, if somewhat vacuous (I guess you'd have to be to be with Mr Congeniality). High heels, tight jeans, midriff exposing sweater under a tightly fitted blazer - probably a size zero. She had to be freezing - it was cold in the arena, I never took my Norwegian sweater with windproofing off. Hair perfectly coiffed, perfect manicure and more makeup than I would wear out to a bar (if I ever actually went out to a bar that is).

He quickly figured out that she had not a clue about the game. And sent her on a few drink runs. And that was just the first period.

It was pretty funny to see her tripping back to their seats, balancing on her high heels while crawling over the lap of the woman mentioned above (who was too large to keep getting up out of her seat). The first time she had two beers and a big bag of popcorn. She excused herself another 3 or so minutes later and came back with two smirnoff plastic cups (this is on top of the two she sat down with - hey - wait, that must be why she wasn't cold).

He suggested that she head out to the bar again with 5:25 left in the 1st period.

"But" she replied, completely perplexed, "there's only 5 minutes left and we can leave."

I, not the most sport savvy, had to stiffle a giggle when he informed her that there were 3 periods to a game.

Do I need to mention that they left 10 minutes before the final buzzer with Ottawa up 5 to 1? Guess not.

But it was a great night - I really had a great time (even thought I was sipping Timmy's peppermint tea instead of Smirnoff).

If only the tickets didn't cost so much. But someone's got to pay for Dany Heatly's $45 mil over 7 years I guess.....

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