Hello 4

(This post has been kicking around in my head for a few days... Julia turned 4 on Tuesday.)

Dear 4,

Nice to meet you - I actually planned to write this as an introduction letter for 3 to give you in the hand-over, but as usual I was behind schedule.

I've been thinking a lot this past week about 3... about how she was when she arrived a year ago and how she was as she was leaving. 3 had a huge year. We moved continents. She went to nursery school. She learned to stand up to her brother. She even went as far as learning how to aggravate him, which is not one of my favourite things about the past year.

They are teaching them sign language at 3's nursery school (she knew all the letters to T - that was last week's letter). She could sing the Hello song in English, French, Spanish and Korean. Yes, Korean. She even introduced her friends to the Hello song in Luxembourgish last week. They may call on you to help out with that 4.

3 learned to go to school and let Mama leave without crying. She learned how to go to friends' houses for playdates and let Mama leave without crying (at this point Mama was the one who sometimes felt like crying). She made a best friend who wasn't part of our family. She took swimming lessons and went to swimming camp over March break - alone. Without Mama, Dado or Stu.

3 liked to be carried. Liked to cuddle - something I am hoping that you do too 4, because cuddles are important. Mamas sometimes need their cuddles in the evening to make up for some of the ones we don't get during the day anymore because you are so busy out there exploring, learning, spreading your wings.

The day before you came 4 Dado built the bicycle that 3 thought you would need. It's a pink and blue and purple with white tires and training wheels. I thought it would take Dado a long time to build it, but it didn't, and 3 saw it in the driveway. She hopped right on and... off she went. As if she'd been doing it every day of her life.

That's when it really hit me that 3 was ready to go and that you, 4, were waiting in the wings to take her place. I have to admit that I felt a little weepy... 4 is so much closer to a big girl than 3, so much further from a baby. 3 was getting heavy enough that I sometimes had trouble carrying her. I am hoping to be able to carry you for a lot longer.

You'll be happy to know that 3 did a lot of work in the last couple of weeks on things like talking to people - friends of mine, other mothers at school. All of a sudden she had a voice and wanted to tell people things. I think she was shedding her shy exterior for you.

I watched 3 go to sleep for the last time and took her picture (yes, while she was sleeping, and yes, with a flash. She didn't move). I sat and watched her for a while, with her little body sprawled across the bed, her little cheeks flushed and mouth a little open. I could still see 2 and even a bit of 1 in her.

The next morning there YOU were! All bright-eyed and bushy tailed and "Hi! I'm FOUR!!!" You are a little larger than life at the moment. The excitement of being you, being 4!!! You talk as if there is an exclamation point after every word, you have had such a great few days.

I hope you enjoyed the barbecue we had on the evening after you arrived. Our neighbours, some of whom had not seen 3 much over the long cold winter commented on all the new stuff that you, 4, can do. Some of the things that I am still getting used to, now that you are here, 4.

It's going to be a big year for you. We have summer camp - this is the first summer, except for the one when 0 was around, that I will be home. I am looking forward to it (for the most part). You start soccer on Monday. You are almost finished nursery school, and you will have to say some goodbyes. You will go to swimming camp again, and karate camp.

And then in the fall you will start school. Real school, with big kids and all. You're going to take the bus and everything - something that really excited 3, and I am sure you will like too. Not sure if I will manage too well with it though.

I'm really glad you are here. You're really cool. Just remember that there's no rush to make room for 5 just yet - she won't be here for another year (no matter how many times you ask how many days until your birthday, it's still almost a year). Please enjoy being you, and let us enjoy you being exactly who you are - 4.

And remember - lots of cuddles. You're still my baby.

Lots of love,

Mama